This is something that I learnt from the Professor under whom I worked at the beginning of my career. No, it is nothing to do with math, compass etc., in case you thought so, as I wrote about my Prof.
What he gave as a simple piece of advice, stuck on. Any task assigned to me, I would have kept working on it, made progress, found flaws, made improvement etc. The one thing I used to not do is, update him. He used to call me and check on the status. Once on noticing that I had made significant progress, he said I should update him regularly, else he would assume I am unable to proceed with the work and am stuck. He said “If I told you something, some task, some info and there is an update in it, you should let me know. You should complete the circle.”
As humans we have the tendency to speak more about the negative stuff happening in our life, the negative aspects of the people in our life, like – my neighbor is irritating me all the time, my MIL keeps nagging, my kid keeps crying etc. You would have noticed that this is very common. In fact I keep ranting all the time on the blog too. But when the things take a positive turn, we don’t speak much about it. Like the time your issues with the neighbor got resolved, the time the MIL kept enquiring on your health, the time your kid behaved like a good boy all day. We are just relieved and leave it at that.
When my Prof. introduced me to Landmark Forum and made me enroll, I had spoken to him about my issues with Dad. About how things were not working out great. He told me to finish the course, work on this aspect of my life, come back and update him when things have changed for the good. He said “Complete the circle. Unless you do, people will still imagine you and your dad as being in a tensed relationship. They will live with the image based on what you told them last. Always go back and tell them when the positive change happens, so their imagination can turn positive too.”
The simple act of completing the circle will bring you peace and happiness and a good feeling to the person on the other side too. Let me share about what happened recently. My Dad worked for a particular company in Hosur for close to 20 years. He used to get a monthly pension for the same after he took a voluntary retirement. When he passed away, we had to inform them and they had to process certain things and return the corpus amount to my Mom. Coordinating with them was going to be difficult as I couldn’t travel back and forth to Chennai for it, where their head office was located.
A lady at the respective department coordinated with me over email and phone and made things ready, sent across the papers, got the approvals, forwarded it to the relevant insurance company too. Once, a document returned to her undelivered as they the courier guy couldn’t find our place, I made arrangements for a friend in Chennai to collect it. She obliged with no objections. Due to her efficiency and fabulous coordination, Mom received the amount quite soon. Having faced so many hassles at different banks, this was a pleasant and smooth experience for me.
I was really thankful for all the help and effort from her end. I had to complete the circle. So I sent her a mail to convey the same, to which she replied!
Her small act of acknowledging my email made me so happy, made me realize she must have been happy too, to see my email. Completing the circle makes so much of a difference. It was her job, she would have received the counterfoil from the insurance company and found out that the money reached us, I needn’t have sent her an email and though I sent her one, there was no necessity that she replied. I had taken her help, I had to thank her. But she did reply and acknowledge which I think was a lovely gesture from her behalf. 🙂
So do you complete your circles or leave them dangling, like I used to at some point of time?