Building THE Home


I realized that unlike others I don’t record the details of the happenings in my life here. Actually I should. The blog should hold a record of what was happening, at different times, in my life, so I can come back and read it someday and recollect it.

The last one year has been extremely hectic and I don’t think I can record all the events in details, even if I tried to. Last year, on May 29th, we did the Gudli Pooja*, of our empty site. Exactly one year later, we are having the Gruhapravesha**. Though the work isn’t complete, we are going ahead with the function, due to insistence from the others in the family and the unavailability of dates later on.

There stands a three-storey house in place of the empty land now. Currently we all stay together in a duplex, rented house. It was my FIL insistence that we construct independent houses, rather than a duplex. As things will keep changing with time, it’s better we stay independently and on good terms, rather than staying together and having cold wars ( I couldn’t agree more ). Since we will all still be staying in the same building, we will still be together.

The construction business has been a tough job. Though the engineer in charge is my own uncle (chickappa/chacha***), he has kept his involvement minimal. He had clearly told, his role will be to monitor the work, provide inputs and advice. He will introduce the teams that work with him. We are free to choose them or get anyone else for the same job. The responsibility of payments, arranging what material we want etc. would be left to us. I think it was the right thing to do. He obviously didn’t want the relationships to go sour, incase anything went wrong.

Though it is a lot of hard work, this arrangement made us, specifically my husband and his brother learn a lot about the materials, labor, pricing and all the work involved. While they both are extremely appreciative about the support, my uncle has rendered, some times, my FIL, in his old age impatience and frustration ends up telling that they did a mistake by not giving a full contract to someone. I get upset when he says so. But I try my best not to react, as I understand that it is his ignorance and concern for his sons, that makes him say things like that.

We faced a lot of other issues, like not finding water when we dug for the bore-well; the truck drivers going on a strike multiple times, which caused the sand prices to shoot up; the granite-layer not turning up after a half done job; the mason cheating us with the money, charging us double the amount etc. But I guess it’s all a part and parcel of the whole process. There is a proverb in Kannada which goes – Mane kaTTi noDu, Maduve maaDi noDu. It means that you should either construct a house or do the preparations for a marriage, to know what difficulties are. I agree that was a bad translation, but I am sure you got the essence of it!

Well.. All said and done, we are having the house-warming. We were running about inviting people all through the week, after office hours. It is an extremely tough job, when the dates are near and the number of people to be invited are more. One thing I noticed on this inviting trips is that, a lot of people kept suggesting that it would have been okay to invite over phone and nobody would mind in today’s times, as everyone is busy. I do agree that it’s a LOT more convenient, but somehow the closeness in inviting people personally is more. Times have indeed changed. Gone are the days, when we could drop in at anybody’s home at any time. Now calls need to be made prior to the visit and I have observed that a lot of people almost get offended, if we turn up surprisingly or call up at the last moment. It is a busy world!

It is sort of the beginning of a new chapter. The completion, moving, setting up, adjusting and settling down is going to be a story of its own, which is going to unfold slowly. šŸ™‚

* A small ritual done to mark the beginning of the construction process.

** House-warming ceremony.

*** Father’s younger brother


19 Comments Add yours

  1. Mi says:

    Arch…congratulations on the new home and housewarming… do upload pics when you are done setting it up! šŸ™‚

    So happy for you.. finally all the efforts have paid off well.. šŸ™‚
    hugs šŸ™‚

    1. Arch says:

      Thank you Mi! Will definitely upload pics.. I am just waiting to! šŸ™‚

  2. greenboochi says:

    Building a house is indeed a very tough job and I think the saying very popular in Tamil as well as Telugu too. When we purchased an apartment in Chennai, I thought all is left to the builder and we would only to have to pay our money and sit relaxed. How wrong was I?! Until now, S has tough time getting done some of the tasks while he stays in Chennai. Its never easy.

    Very nice of you, not to mind your FIL’s words. Its easy to get pulled in both the directions – with both the sides close to you.

    And with inviting people – I agree thats the toughest job – especially in today’s world.

    I wish all the very best to you and Bg šŸ™‚

    1. Monkey Mind says:

      “kalyaanatha pannipaaru, veetai kattipaaru’ is that saying in tamil na, GB?

      Congratulations on your new home Arch! Hope it brings all happiness and joy into your lives! šŸ™‚ šŸ™‚

      It is a good idea to stay together but not live in the same house. Makes life easier šŸ™‚

      1. Arch says:

        Thank you MM! šŸ™‚

    2. Arch says:

      Yeah.. the work involved is too much! Phew! :-/
      Thanks GB. šŸ™‚

  3. Bikramjit says:

    hey that is tomorrow.. wowow.. have a good day and enjoy the housewarming.. and Congratssssssssssssssss

    and staying separate is a good advice I am sure as FIL says things will change etc etc ..

    and hey where is my invite šŸ˜¦ …

    Have a great dayyyyyyyy and enjoyyyyyyyyyyy

    1. Arch says:

      Thanks Bikram! šŸ™‚
      You didn’t come… šŸ˜¦

      1. Bikramjit says:

        I know but my wishes and prayers I hope reached on time …

        congrats once again

  4. Titaxy says:

    congratulations on the new house, arch. best wishes for the new beginnings.

    1. Arch says:

      Thank you so much T! šŸ™‚ šŸ™‚

  5. Congrats! Love your FIL ‘s solution on living separately. So nice to see in his generation

    1. Arch says:

      Thank you Pop! šŸ™‚

  6. paatiamma says:

    Congratulations on ur new hme Arch!! šŸ™‚

    1. Arch says:

      thank you Paatiamma! šŸ™‚

  7. A very very hearty congrats Arch. I know mane kaTTodu eshTu kashTa anta – adre kashTa paTTare phala unTu is another proverb šŸ™‚ (Hard work bears fruits)
    wishing you happy beginnings, happy days and lots of peace always, Arch! (Just that one line in Kannada made me teary. Languages are so powerful šŸ™‚ )

    1. Arch says:

      oh wow Kismi!! You speak Kannada! šŸ™‚ It’s so elating to know that! šŸ™‚ šŸ™‚
      Thank you so much! šŸ™‚

  8. Congrats for the new house Arch. Constructing a house is no joke.

    1. Arch says:

      Thank you AK! šŸ™‚

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