Ranting all the way…

I have been intending to write regularly and reach the 100th post milestone on my blog, since God knows when! Am still one short. :-/ I wonder why is it that I lose interest in everything so easily. I am yet to find that One thing, doing which will constantly keep me motivated and enthusiastic. I am curious to learn stuff and do things and very soon, I see myself losing interest in the same or rather the zeal for it goes down.

As a kid I wasn’t like this. I used to love painting and doing craft work and if I sat with something, I would be so obsessed, that it would be difficult to make me stop. I still remember the times, that I used to sit to paint on that small desk I had, with all the brushes, water and paints.Β  I wonder what happens to that passion, as we grow up. Where did it get lost? Now most time is spent in self-doubt and just wondering if it’s worth all the effort!

I think the lack of time plays a major role too. I am dead tired by the time I reach home nowadays. I get just about 3 hrs at home before bed-time and I am also lacking sleep. My eyelids have been twitching since more than a week now, due to strain and lack of sleep I guess. With such little time, I don’t feel motivated to do anything, let alone try something new. But I want to do so many things. That list keeps growing too. Striking a balance is really difficult!

All the transitions happening at the workplace has left me confused about the job. The major factor is the commuting time, which I really want to cut down as much as possible. Since moving near to the office is not possible, finding a job as close to the new house as possible is the only solution. Even the closest major IT park is about an hour away. In the midst of all this, I see friends who pursue their craft too and open an online store/Facebook page for their stuff, along with pursuing their job. That was an idea I had got ages ago and yet I am no where close to even starting off. I disappoint myself! 😦

At times all I want, is to disconnect myself from all the relationships and be on my own. The responsibilities and expectations get to you at some point of time and all you want is to stop taking care of only others needs and think about yourself. It is close to two years of marriage and we haven’t taken even a single vacation for ourselves. Even traveling happens either to visit the temple for certain poojas or to attend a wedding/function. No time to unwind. It has been more than a year that my husband has been busy with the construction of the house and we have hardly got time for each other. Hence I am irked immensely when he starts accompanying his friend ( who is currently constructing a house ) on almost all his trips to get the material/timber/granite. I mean, come on! I have had enough of it for a year and a half, give it a break! If he doesn’t stop it soon, I am going to approach his friend and tell him directly! 😑

This became a rant, which was not the intention when I started writing the post! But, what the heck! What’ve you been upto?

P.S: Edited to say, apparently this is my 100th post! It said so on publishing. But the dashboard still shows 99. :-/ Well.. Yay to me!! πŸ™‚

12 Comments Add yours

  1. Bikramjit says:

    oh yess yayyyyyyyyyyyyyy to you .. and i am firsttttttttttt πŸ™‚ now let me read what you ranting about πŸ™‚

    1. Bikramjit says:

      oh no .. iwould say not to go to your hubby’s friend direct .. your hubby might not like that ..

      and the number of hours in the day I need 48 hours long day .. my day seems to go like that and you 3 hours i dont get that either .. I get out of my house at 6:30-6:45 AM and come back around 11 or later and straight to bed πŸ™‚

      but then i like this busy because it keep me out of trouble and I dont have time to think so that is a added advantage πŸ™‚

      All will be fine .. take care

      1. Arch says:

        Thank you Bikram!
        Your day seems even more hectic! 😐

  2. greenboochi says:

    Yay on your 100th post πŸ™‚ Keep writing more Arch πŸ™‚

    Coming to the post, I wish the day was longer too. I am left so tired by the end of the day that I cant think of starting all over again the next day.
    Its been 3years S and I went on a vacation. Every trip was made for home. Sigh. I can so understand your need for break.
    Try talking to Bg on helping his friend, he would understand for sure πŸ™‚

    Take care Arch πŸ™‚

    1. Arch says:

      Thank you so much GB! πŸ™‚
      Why is it so hard to find time for ourselves? I keep wondering on what’s the whole point of working so hard when we have no time to enjoy life! :-/

  3. Mi says:

    Awesome..Congratulations on your 100th post! πŸ™‚ I remember reading similar posts on few other blogs as well.. What I mean to say is, you are not the only one. I would have written this post myself.. .we all usually have something or the other that keeps us from doing what we like.. that’s some wise guy once say, make work yourplay, and you’ll never have to look for hobbies.. or whatever,,you got my point? Work some times takes a lot out of us, but then, not working is not an option, usually..

    hopefully you find something to reduce your commutation time and find time for yourself..

    all the best arch.. πŸ™‚

    1. Arch says:

      Thank you Mi! πŸ™‚ It was hard, reaching the 100! Phew! πŸ˜›
      I really hope I find some way to find time!

  4. Mi says:

    that’s some wise guy once said, make work your play, and you’ll never have to look for hobbies.. or whatever..something like that..**

  5. Tharani says:

    Congrats on the 100th post.
    Hugs Arch.. May be you could plan a vacation now with lots of long weekends coming. Just take a break. It will definitely help.

    1. Arch says:

      Thanks Tharani! πŸ™‚
      No vacation anytime soon. 😦 All long weekends spent in festival preparations and other stuff! But we surely need to plan something soon…

  6. Congrats on the 100th post Arch. Same here. Work has been keeping me busy and have been having a hard time making some time to write. You should talk to your husband about helping his friend I guess. You should definitely plan a vacation.

    1. Arch says:

      Thank you AK! πŸ™‚
      I have been speaking to my hubby about it. He nods his head in agreement when I tell him something. Then cannot refuse to his friend when he asks him to come along. :-/

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