Love they say is overrated. Is it really? Come to think of it, what is life without love and care? Love in any form – love for your children, love between siblings, among friends, love for your partner. These form the essence of life. It is among these relationships that we exist and evolve. If we have experienced even one of these forms of love we are blessed.
I always pictured love to be perfect. As a child I thought perfect love was when parents agreed to everything you told, they understood your need for liberty as you grew, gave you your space, appreciated your efforts etc. Reality is far from this. Parents tend to get over protective, guide you from their experience, have huge expectations from you. It’s only later that I realized that these are also ways of expressing love. Different from what you expect, but justified in their own way. Parenting now is changing. But if parents have evolved, you won’t be surprised to see that so have the children. 😛
Similar has been the case with finding love in marriage. The rosy dreams of love being showered on you will all disappear like a mist, when you see the husband lazing around in pajamas, not responding to your talks. But there are subtler things, which you will miss if you don’t notice them. A lot of differences erupt between people within just a few months of marriage. I am no one to judge them, but in my opinion everything needs time.
I for one can vouch for the fact that love grows with time. The perspective changes over time – from cribbing about how the husband doesn’t care about maintaining himself to noticing the reason for the sun-burnt freckled face. But that can only happen when you focus on the subtle things and appreciate its presence. Noticing that the husband puts my comfort over his, prioritizes my needs over his, is there at every occasion that’s important to me, backs and encourages all my hobbies.
It took me time to not judge BG’s tanned skin but look at it with warmth. It took me time to accept that what seemed like a bias towards his family is more of a knack to handle situations. It took me time to realize that his nature of not complimenting me is just his inexperience with such things. It took me time to notice that there is so much love and concern. Touchwood.
I hope and pray that we love each other more in the years to come and that we can always look beyond all the differences that are sure to be there. ❤