The weather of Bengaluru perfectly reflects how my mood has been for the past two weeks. Gloomy, dull and gray.
I have set the bar for myself really high. When I don’t meet it, I am so disappointed. I am my own enemy, truly. The last couple of weeks, I’ve been attending interviews. Having no work was getting to me. But attending interviews and not clearing them is making me feel even more hopeless. For one, I’ve been on a yearlong break, so I am not really in sync with the industry happenings. Secondly I don’t find enough time for preparation. I am well aware of these facts and yet, I let these failures affect me.
I’m not even sure if I should be looking out for a change. The job I have is really close to my house and commute which is a major worry in Bengaluru, is something that I don’t even have to think about. My family keeps telling me to stick to the present job and not waste time commuting.
I really need something to uplift my mood right now. Like meeting an old friend and having a long chat or peacefully sip a cup of hot chai and sit reading a book in a corner, with no one to disturb me for a while or get under a warm rug and sleep for a few hours with no disturbance. All these are far from happening and makes me feel cross. 😡 Not a great way to start the week I suppose.